(Newman Hall, “Leaves of Healing from the Garden of Grief” 1891)
“He went on a little farther and fell face down on the ground, praying: My Father! If it is possible, let this cup of suffering be taken away from Me. Yet I want Your will, not Mine.” Matthew 26:39
Throughout His life, Jesus was the Man of Sorrows, and many of His disciples go mourning all their days by reason of continued . . .
illness,
unkindness,
loneliness,
anxiety,
successive sorrows,
stripes repeated before the former wounds are healed
–one woe treading on the heels of another, as with Job.
Because some thorn is always rankling.
When one rocky crag has been surmounted, another has to be scaled.
And when one troublous torrent has been waded, another and yet another roars across our path.
Therefore you may plead that your heavenly Father would . . .
relieve the pain,
heal the sickness,
spare the life,
remove the danger,
calm the anxiety,
restore the love,
restrain the sin,
abate the anger,
disperse the cloud,
calm the storm,
send the sunshine.
I WANT YOUR WILL NOT MINE
My Father, pity your foolish child but bear with me while I confess that this bitter cup depresses my spirit, raises doubts, disturbs my faith, irritates my temper, drives me to frivolity, hinders prayer, and tempts me to seek relief wrongfully. I am taught that affliction should make me humble and patient, gentle to others, weaned from earth, submissive to You–but this cup seems to produce opposite results.
Therefore let this cup pass from me! My soul is bowed down to the dust! Because my tears have been my food day and night! O my God, my soul is cast down within me; all Your waves and Your billows are gone over me. Therefore Abba, Father, let this cup pass from me!
“Behold me, even me; listen to my complaint. Therefore behold this cup–how bitter it is, how full, how long I have had to drink it! In my ignorance, it seems unsuited to my temperament. Because How wearied and faint I am! How earnestly I desire to be spared the further drinking of it. Because my Father! witness these tears, hear these cries, consider my soul’s agony! Therefore Abba, Father, if it is possible, let this cup of suffering be taken away from me. Yet I want Your will, not mine.”
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