The lesson of living with others

(J.R. Miller, “Getting Along with People” 1898) LISTEN to audio!  Download audio

At every point as we go on into the thickening experiences of life–the lesson of living with others meets us. It is not always easy to gracefully accept these contacts with others, and to enter into kindly relations with them.

There are some people who seem to be very good alone, while no one comes near them, while no other life touches theirs, when they have to think of no one but themselves–who make wretched business of living when they come into personal relations with others! Then they are selfish, tyrannical, despotic, willful, and exacting! They will not yield to any other one’s desire or needs. They must have their own way; and they drive their life like a rough plow-share right through the comforts, the desires, the feelings, of others!

It seems almost a pity there could not be a few corners fenced off in this great world for such people as these, where they could live altogether alone, with no one ever to interfere with their rights or liberties, or to impinge upon their comfort in any way.


But this is not God’s ordinance for human lives.

We are to live together in families, in communities, in friendship’s circle. Indeed, no worse fate could befall us, than to be doomed to live alone.
We might thus be absolved from the duties of love,
then have our own way,
we would not be required to think of anybody but ourselves,
and there would be no call for self-denial or sacrifice.
But meanwhile, we would be growing into monsters of selfishness!

We never can learn love’s lessons, except in life’s school, where the lessons are set for us in actual human relationships.

“Finally, all of you, live in harmony with one another; be sympathetic, love as brothers, be compassionate and humble.” 1 Peter 3:8
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